Many of us would like to get an answer to the question of what it means to be bored. The most curious thing is that in foreign languages there is no absolute analogue of this concept. In some cases, the verb “remember” is used, in others – “to be sad.” Why don’t they fully reveal the meaning of the word “bored”? Let’s figure it out.
What does the dictionary say
The concept is most fully presented in the dictionary of D. N. Ushakov. In it, you can find three meanings of this word, one of which is somewhat outdated. In the XIX century. often the verb “bored” was understood as some kind of mental suffering from idleness. To experience boredom means to languish from doing nothing. It is no coincidence that M. Gorky proposed an effective alternative to such suffering:
He who works does not get bored.
We also rarely use the second meaning of this word. It is easier to explain it through a synonym. To be bored means to be sick, to experience physical and psychological suffering. In the works of Russian classics, you can find expressions that say that this or that hero missed his feet at night, for example. This means that the pain kept him awake.
But more often we use the verb “bored” when we talk about painful experiences associated with the absence of someone or something. It is this aspect that we will analyze in a little more detail.
The best way to understand what it means to be bored is to look at verbs that are similar in meaning. In the concept itself, two points should be highlighted:
- There must be an object that evokes certain feelings in us.
- A word is needed that describes this emotional process.
Who or what can you miss? Let’s list the most common objects:
- Friends, parents, other relatives and close people.
- Beloved person.
- Homeland, certain places with which fond memories are associated.
- Activities that, for one reason or another, are not possible to engage in.
What feelings do these objects evoke in a person when we use the concept of “bored”? Let’s list the main synonyms:
- to be sad;
We deliberately do not use the word “love”, although in the minds of many it is precisely this word that is the main source of what we miss.
Love or emotional addiction?
In romantic relationships, the most commonly used verbs are “bored” and “wait”. This is understandable. When the lovers part, all their thoughts are devoted exclusively to the object of passion, that is, to each other. Even during an exciting activity or interesting communication, nothing can knock off the dominant present in the brain. The main desire of a lover is to be close to a loved one again. What does “bored” mean to him? Wait for the moment when this happens, to touch your partner, hear his voice, kiss.
The state of the lover can be described in the following words:
- languishes without affection;
- takes offense at the fate that does not allow being close to a dear person;
- longs for a new meeting.
Psychologists consider it harmless to admit a man in love that he missed him. Especially during a long separation. However, this state, if it becomes obsessive, speaks not at all of strong feelings towards a particular person, but of emotional attachment and even dependence. It is characterized by the fact that a person loses personal autonomy and begins to suffer in the absence of a significant subject or object for him (a favorite thing, for example).
More on emotional addiction
Close people are communicating vessels that influence each other. One has a bad mood – the other begins to be sad. If a spouse is worried, anxiety settles in the heart of his wife. However, even relatives living together cannot constantly be in the same state of mind.
Someone is more annoyed, someone is tired of communication or relationships in general. These negative manifestations are immediately transmitted to the partner or household members. They begin to exert super-efforts to bring a loved one out of his state, and then they themselves begin to get nervous and break down.
This strains a person who feels a huge responsibility for what is happening. But he cannot constantly show empathy, entertain loved ones and give them only positive emotions. And if they begin to suffer, then we are talking about emotional dependence. From which it is bad for both sides. It is possible that a person decides to get out of such a relationship, and then the partner will have to be bored alone.
As a rule, the most severe suffering will be experienced by people who are dependent, in need of outside control and guidance, problematic and socially immature individuals. Those who cannot live without the dope of love and attention. What is the synonym for this phenomenon? Boredom means being emotionally dependent on other people or objects.
Is it possible to be bored joyfully?
There are situations when we are far from the usual life. For example, a guy is serving in the army or a girl went to study in another city. Of course, both will miss their relatives, home environment, mother’s favorite cutlets, school friends, dog, etc. Let’s go back to the foreigners. How would they say?
- The guy constantly thinks about his mother’s cutlets.
- The girl is sad for the dog, which there is no one to take for a walk.
What does the Russian language add by introducing the word “bored”? Soreness of experience. We don’t just remember about our mother’s cutlets – we are not able to feel completely happy without them. So can you be bored with joy? We hope that the answer will be given by the readers themselves.
What does “miss” mean? Falling into an emotional trap that has nothing to do with real love and other similar feelings. Realizing this, a person needs to work on the development of his own personality, to become more understanding, independent, busy, interesting for loved ones.