Once upon a time, it was customary to call people lovers who experienced tenderness or passion for each other. Often these people did not even enter into a sexual relationship, they had enough warmth and tenderness that they gave each other. Probably, this was the reason for the appearance of surprisingly touching poems and poems, songs and novels … But somehow, quite imperceptibly, the status of such a person from the sublime and beautiful moved to a more mundane and even forbidden. Instead of a spiritual bond, today only physical attraction remains between partners. But why do women have lovers? Out of boredom, out of curiosity, or out of a desire to fill your life with thrills and drama? There is no definite answer to this question. But we will try to figure out what exactly pushes the fairer sex to such a risky step.
Experts say: almost 60% of girls who had a relationship outside their family experienced the most real feelings for their lovers, right down to love! But men who have connections on the side usually do not feel feelings for their mistresses. In addition, ladies who spend the whole day in the office are more likely to have an affair on the side, while women who work from home are much less likely to. By the way, 57% of working young ladies first met their lover at work.
Cheating in the understanding of women and men
Psychologists say: the average age of young ladies who initiate relationships on the side is usually about 30 years or more. Why do women have lovers? From the point of view of male and female psychology, this has completely different meanings – the appearance of someone on the side. For example, for men, going to the left is just a search for something new and unknown, an attempt to diversify their lives. In turn, women decide on adultery in the event that they lack something from the other half. These can be financial, emotional, or other needs. And the main reason, according to psychologists, is despair! Just imagine, a husband may not even understand what is happening, because a woman who is cheating on him behaves impeccably. This is a wonderful housewife who looks after herself, looks breathtaking, her self-esteem rises, she is always in a good mood, and she practically does not nag her spouse. Only now this is happening not because she has overcome some internal barriers in her relationship with her husband, but because she simply enjoys the extramarital affair, from which she receives everything that is lacking in marriage with a partner.
Now let’s look at the main reasons that can answer the question of why women have lovers.
If a man does not devote time to his partner at all, is too passionate about his affairs, hobbies, communication with friends or a car, his companion is unlikely to sit still. By the way, often married women who do not work, spend almost all their time at home or with friends. The more a man immerses himself in his own life, the higher the likelihood that his wife at the same time, behind his back, is giving him horns. And every day the partners will become more and more distant from each other. Lost intimacy will be extremely difficult to recover.
Speaking about why women have lovers, psychologists say: the monotony of sexual life almost always interferes with a happy marriage. Of course, passion dies down over time. Moreover, when people know each other well, are able to understand each other without words, the effect of novelty may disappear in their relations. All movements are brought to automatism, while depriving them of emotions. Of course, irritation accumulates between partners, the search for satisfaction begins, often on the side. In this case, the situation can be completely saved: for this you need to arrange romantic dates for your half more often, try to diversify your sex life, and take a fresh look at the other half. If a man is able to please his wife, she is unlikely to think about cheating.
Desire to conquer
You may be surprised, but among the fairer sex there are many hunters who are interested in winning a new victim no less than men. Some ladies, experts in family relationships say, need from time to time to check how their female charms work, to assert themselves in the role of a goddess who is capable of throwing crowds of men at her feet with just one glance. And most often they are not interested in the result as much as the hunting process itself.
Why do married women have lovers? Another reason for this is banal curiosity. Do not forget that the forbidden fruit is always sweet, this makes the relationship with another man more interesting several times, even if in fact the woman has no need to cheat on her lawful half.
Solving financial issues
Perhaps this does not sound very nice, but the new gentleman is able to provide his beloved with material resources and expensive gifts, and after all, the legal spouse does not always have such an opportunity. In addition, many husbands believe that a wife is their property, which is not worth spending on. But the new beloved will strive to keep the woman close to him, sometimes with the help of too generous gifts.
When talking about why married women have lovers, this aspect cannot be mentioned either. Quite often, legitimate husbands consider their everyday burdens truly unbearable. Of course, taking out the trash can and washing the dishes is energy-consuming. In addition, the daily monotony of performing the same actions can tire even the most powerful in spirit. However, women are sometimes also a burden to do household chores. But the affair on the side of all the troubles is far: it is exclusively romance and acuteness. Such a love boat will not have to break about everyday life.
Lack of spouse support
Quite often, a lady decides to commit adultery when she realizes that her husband does not pay due attention to her and does not support her, increasingly ignores and accepts all the actions of the other half for granted. This cannot be said about the man on the side: for him a woman is always beautiful, the most intelligent, interesting, bright and unusual.
The acuity of sensations
Quite often, experts in the field of family relations say, spouses get mutual pleasure from love affairs on the side. Yes, yes, they share with each other their feelings and new experiences. Yes, to some it may seem absolutely unacceptable – to get a new experience in bed on the side, and then bring it to marriage. But for some, this behavior is the norm. There is a somewhat simplified version: a wife just wants to make her husband jealous, and for this she has to openly flirt with men – right in front of her legal spouse.
Another reason a woman has a lover is that her spouse is also a walker. The person sincerely wants to let him know what it is like to not trust your partner, feel humiliated, constantly worry that someone might be better and more attractive.
This point helps answer questions about why women have young lovers. Like men, in their midst, in order to be no worse than others, it is simply necessary to have an attractive young boy nearby. This is a kind of indicator of the demand and attractiveness of the fairer sex. A young and beautiful lover for a married woman who plays the difficult role of a socialite is necessary at least to give her special charm and charm.
Attraction or even sincere feelings
It also happens that a married young lady decides to cheat because she actually feels sympathy or even love for another man. Perhaps his courtship allows her to feel like a queen, one, beloved and unique.
Of course, there are many more reasons why a married woman has a lover, they are all completely diverse: emotional and sexual, social and everyday … Of course, a logical question arises: if a person is looking for something that is missing in the family, on the side, has she done everything in order to receive what is missing within your own family? Has she ever spoken to her husband about her needs and desires? Maybe he just is not able to meet her needs? Or maybe the woman’s needs are too high? There are a lot of questions, almost all of them are rhetorical. At the same time, it should be understood that the choice of such persons often falls on unfree men. Why do women have married lovers? This helps to protect yourself from completely unnecessary showdowns and promises, claims from a man, because he himself is not free, he cannot demand anything from her. This allows the woman to feel as safe as possible. A married lover is unlikely to demand to end the relationship with her husband, he will not begin to blackmail a woman. After all, he has a “stigma in the gun”.
Should a woman have a lover?
Of course, this always comes with risks to the marriage. It takes a lot of effort to hide your new friend from family and friends. It is important to take into account that you will have to constantly monitor yourself and your appearance and behavior, portray passion when it subsides in a marriage with your legal husband, control the schedule of the day so that meetings with your beloved go unnoticed by the household. In addition, there is always a chance of catching, for example, a sexually transmitted disease, or getting pregnant from a new partner. Moreover, intimacy may not be as good as previously expected, and over time it will turn into the same routine that a married woman already has at home – in bed with her husband. Of course, the biggest risk is the ability to destroy your own marriage. And this is often completely irreversible. Husbands are rarely able to forgive an unfaithful spouse and accept her back after she has secretly dated another man. In addition, if the husband forgives adultery, do not forget that it is not so easy to wash this shameful stain from his reputation. The question of why a woman has a lover will torment her husband for a long time.
To change or not to change? Each woman must make the choice herself. Of course, before that, it is important to understand the reason that pushes her to marital infidelity. Perhaps family relationships can be improved simply by talking to your spouse about resentments and expectations. And sometimes the best solution is divorce. After him, with a clear conscience, you can start a relationship with anyone – without damaging your reputation.